moonflowers highlights..April 2011..

Moderator's monthly picks from the "Funny Business" forum

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moonflowers highlights..April 2011..

Post by moonflower » Sun May 08, 2011 10:54 pm

hello to all! :hello: sorry for being gone so much this month..Spring is such a busy time!..well, here are the highlights for April... :grin: :grin:


Nonsense verse....written by poeticpiers

I tried to do things properly
I asked her father for her hand.
The old fool didn’t understand
and chose to send her hand to me.
By first class post but C.O.D

She said she would but she did not
I have forgiven, not forgot.
I will not trust her word again
I rather think she lost the plot
In other words that is her lot.

The Very Reverend Doctor Hecht
was very fond of poetry
Not the kind you might expect
of a man of intellect.
He thrived on sensuality.

I asked the lady for a dance
and she accepted willingly.
I was not looking for romance
but the lady saw her chance
and now I am no longer free.
Poet of the Month


paraprosdokian....collected by heinzs

A paraprosdokian (from the Greek meaning 'beyond expectation') is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is unexpected in a way that causes the reader or listener to re-frame or re-interpret the first part.

* I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

* Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

* The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.

* Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

* If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.

* We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.

* War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

* Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

* Evening news is where they begin with 'Good Evening,' and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

* To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

* A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.

* I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.

* Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says, 'In case of emergency, notify:' I put 'DOCTOR.'

* I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

* Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

* Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.

* A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.

* You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

* Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.

* There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.

* I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.

* You're never too old to learn something stupid.

* To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

* Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

* Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

* Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

* A diplomat is someone who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you look forward to the trip.

* Hospitality is making your guests feel at home even when you wish they were.

* I always take life with a grain of salt. Plus a slice of lemon, and a shot of tequila.

* When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.

* If we are supposed to learn from our mistakes, why do some people have more than one child?


hey thanks to everyone for stopping in during April :grin: ..May is here so i hope all of you come and visit some more! :grin: :hello:
inside each soul there is music...let the music play..

visit my poets page


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