Your kisses, once mended and cleansed my wounds
now infect me
Your knife, once exposed your soul to me
now in my back
Your words, once something of beauty, to escape with
now cut right through my chest
Your pain, once saddened me, I shared it with you
now makes me rejoice
My thoughts, once made me smile, happy
now break my heart
My eyes, once glowed with joy, passion
now dull, gazing into space
My smile, once white, permanent and a welcome sight
now no longer exists
My heart, once jumped at the sight of you
now no longer beats.
this is my first post on this site and im just looking for some criticism and some help with the title. anything is appreciated, thanks
On the Other Hand (thank you ven :) )
On the Other Hand (thank you ven :) )
Last edited by bren on Sat Jan 27, 2007 8:49 pm, edited 1 time in total.
- Ven
- Forum Admin - and Closet Hippie
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Hello Bren, welcome to the Poetry Pages. I enjoyed your first post and look forward to seeing more. How about " On the Other Hand " for a title ?
.
"Forever is short thought when your skipping this close to the edge".
Ven's MYSPACE
___________________
Google this number; 1905363966
.
"Forever is short thought when your skipping this close to the edge".
Ven's MYSPACE
___________________
Google this number; 1905363966
.
- heinzs
- The Fat Cat
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- Joined: Tue Dec 18, 2001 12:01 am
- Tag line: Do no harm
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An' it harm none, do what ye will. Blessed Be.
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My Poet's Page Archive | Topics I've started
- Ven
- Forum Admin - and Closet Hippie
- Posts: 754
- Joined: Sun Aug 25, 2002 12:01 am
- Location: Wales U.K.
- Contact:
Your welcome
.
"Forever is short thought when your skipping this close to the edge".
Ven's MYSPACE
___________________
Google this number; 1905363966
.
"Forever is short thought when your skipping this close to the edge".
Ven's MYSPACE
___________________
Google this number; 1905363966
.
- heinzs
- The Fat Cat
- Posts: 8419
- Joined: Tue Dec 18, 2001 12:01 am
- Tag line: Do no harm
- Location: Novato, CA
- Contact:
Re: On the Other Hand (thank you ven :) )
An' it harm none, do what ye will. Blessed Be.
***************************************
My Poet's Page Archive | Topics I've started
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