flashes in the night disappear like a blink of an eye.
words once spoken now held dear in a dying soul.
not a sound is made now as he lays on the cold unforgiven ground.
images of a little blonde with pigtail curls running after him
crying.a tear rolls off his cheek in a silent outburst of realization comes to mind that everyone will mourn over him.some will lose their sanity upon losing a friend...a brother....a husband.
with every ounce of his last strength,he prayed a silent prayer that his death will be avenged.
unknown prayer
Moderator: bags123
- wadley gurl
- Clearwater Poet
- Posts: 108
- Joined: Mon Feb 18, 2008 11:19 am
- Location: In my fiance's arms.....
- Contact:
unknown prayer
Love looks not with the eyes but with the mind
-Helena-
A Midsummer night's dream
-Helena-
A Midsummer night's dream
- Jimi
- Clearwater Poet
- Posts: 15
- Joined: Sun Dec 23, 2001 12:01 am
- Location: Manchester England
- Contact:
Re: unknown prayer
Hi wadley gurl
Just a couple of small points. In line three, you mention the "unforgiven ground". Do you actually mean that the ground has not been forgiven or that it is unforgiving?
Secondly, in line 5 the formatting disapears. Is this intentional? If so, I'd be interested to know why you chose to lay it out this way.
Thanks for the read and I look forward to reading more of your work.
Kind regards
Jimi
Just a couple of small points. In line three, you mention the "unforgiven ground". Do you actually mean that the ground has not been forgiven or that it is unforgiving?
Secondly, in line 5 the formatting disapears. Is this intentional? If so, I'd be interested to know why you chose to lay it out this way.
Thanks for the read and I look forward to reading more of your work.
Kind regards
Jimi
Poetry is just the evidence of life. If your life is burning well, poetry is just the ash.
(Leonard Cohen)
(Leonard Cohen)
- wadley gurl
- Clearwater Poet
- Posts: 108
- Joined: Mon Feb 18, 2008 11:19 am
- Location: In my fiance's arms.....
- Contact:
Re: unknown prayer
well i meant that the ground no longer is safe like it betrayed the body by taking it in you get what i'm saying?
ty i'll be looking forward to reading yours too
ty i'll be looking forward to reading yours too
Love looks not with the eyes but with the mind
-Helena-
A Midsummer night's dream
-Helena-
A Midsummer night's dream
Re: unknown prayer
spoiled ground ?
blighted ground ?
I like where you're going, but that does stick out.
Thanks for sharing.
blighted ground ?
I like where you're going, but that does stick out.
Thanks for sharing.
"You leapt into the abyss, but find, It only goes up to your knees"... Nick Cave
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