Search found 52 matches

by nacona
Sun Nov 26, 2006 12:08 am
Forum: In Tribute
Topic: Remembering
Replies: 3
Views: 952

Remembering

Remembering Father, I look over and you are next to me with your fishing rod clasped tightly in your hands, and I trace the transparent line to where it vanishes beneath the tree reflected surface. Hunched over the edge of your boat, I watch as the river tide slaps the side and my reflection wavers...
by nacona
Sun Nov 26, 2006 12:06 am
Forum: Workshop/Critiques Wanted
Topic: The Un-Born Poem
Replies: 1
Views: 1040

The Un-Born Poem

The Un-Born Poem The embryo of this poem is only partially formed. The white blue lined page of my womb is just five lines full, and even as I etch out each red-inked word the cramps grip my side as if the fiery fist of God. I can feel each sentence slide like warm milk down my thigh as the ink-wel...
by nacona
Tue Nov 21, 2006 8:38 am
Forum: Love and Romance
Topic: **Verbal Love** Community Favorite
Replies: 24
Views: 7745

gordy, Like I said I really enjoyed this read, and when I saw this poem, and read through it twice, I then read through all the posts and realizing that it had enough comments to qualify as a community favorite, I just could not help but nominate it as one. Congrats! You have done an awsome job on t...
by nacona
Sat Nov 18, 2006 6:17 pm
Forum: Community Favorites, Poem of the Week and Poet of the Month
Topic: COMMUNITY FAVORITES NOMINATIONS!!!
Replies: 19
Views: 39091

Ok, I am not sure how often we are supposed to name community favorites, but I would like to nominate the following-

Title: Verbal Love
Author: Gordy
Catagory:Love and Romance
Link: http://www.poetrypages.com/phpBB2/viewt ... 317#353317
by nacona
Sat Nov 18, 2006 6:11 pm
Forum: Love and Romance
Topic: **Verbal Love** Community Favorite
Replies: 24
Views: 7745

Nice job with this one Gordy, I just had to bump this back up! The style and voice of this poem is unique, and the flow is nice, I like how you have used rhyme. Thanks for sharing this!

Cheers!

Shawn Nacona
by nacona
Sat Nov 18, 2006 7:07 am
Forum: Briefs:
Topic: November Trees
Replies: 7
Views: 1544

What an awsome poem, I love the imagery, and the trees shivering in the winter yearning for the clothes of spring! WOW! Simply and awsome read, thank you for sharing!

Cheers!

Shawn Nacona
by nacona
Fri Nov 17, 2006 12:51 pm
Forum: Briefs:
Topic: Haiku #1
Replies: 3
Views: 1145

Haiku #1

Haiku #1

hole-punched snow
waterfall plunges striking
down chunks of ice


11/13/2006
3rd Draft
Charlotte, NC
by nacona
Fri Nov 17, 2006 12:47 pm
Forum: Briefs:
Topic: Senryu #1
Replies: 3
Views: 937

Senryu #1

Senryu #1

her body a curved
hourglass tonight
she kisses with time


11/13/2006
2nd Draft
Charlotte, NC
by nacona
Thu Nov 16, 2006 8:38 am
Forum: Love and Romance
Topic: Diamonds
Replies: 10
Views: 1822

Floetry Spades, I enjoyed this read for its sensual feel, you write this style very well, and I am impressed with you poem. The last line is grabbing, but you know its funny because I have thought that before in a situation like that, which to me makes this realistic. Very nice job, thanks for shari...
by nacona
Wed Nov 15, 2006 5:41 am
Forum: Love and Romance
Topic: Morning After
Replies: 14
Views: 2453

negatvone, In my honest opinion you could leave the form how it is and it will work. It reads great, and it is balenced well, I was just making a note that because of how you have applied the rhyme, it could be re-cast into couplets which is fun that this poem can work just as well in each form. Now...
by nacona
Tue Nov 14, 2006 6:42 am
Forum: Love and Romance
Topic: Morning After
Replies: 14
Views: 2453

negatvone, Wow! You have done an awsome job on this one. Morning After Looking on this window seal Trying now; the pain must feel Weary thought that has the light To comfort heads upon this night Seeking for the retention of the past Knowing that the misery will last Of hatred poured into my cup Fee...
by nacona
Tue Nov 14, 2006 6:33 am
Forum: Love and Romance
Topic: **Present Perfect** Poem of the Week 7/23/06
Replies: 15
Views: 3993

Friend_forever, Thank you for sharing this, this truly deserved a forum award, I enjoyed your poem, this was sensuous, passionate, romantic, intense, and beautiful in that it is a great description through imagery of the act of love making. Awsome job! Cheers! :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: Shawn ...
by nacona
Fri Oct 27, 2006 7:07 am
Forum: Workshop/Critiques Wanted
Topic: ANGELA
Replies: 5
Views: 1850

coolpoet, In was going to break this down for you, and you changed the form, revised and reposted. I have to agree with Hienzs. I am reading through, and I cannot see a whole lot I would change. This form is much better by the way, and I see that you listened to the advice I gave you in a short crit...
by nacona
Wed Oct 25, 2006 3:18 pm
Forum: Workshop/Critiques Wanted
Topic: Matchbooks 4th Draft
Replies: 11
Views: 2370

Thanks for the reads and crits everybody! In this draft I attempted to break the poem apart a little bit by playing with the form. Let me know if it works!

Cheers!

Shawn Nacona
by nacona
Mon Oct 23, 2006 3:39 pm
Forum: Workshop/Critiques Wanted
Topic: Matchbooks 4th Draft
Replies: 11
Views: 2370

negatvone, Thank you for the read and posting your suggestions on this one. I did try breaking this up in several different ways, and passed it along two a couple friends of poet friends of mine, I also posted it in the other workshop that I post in and everybody told me that it reads better without...

Go to advanced search